


Melting Your Tear Ducts Sounds Extreme

by adroitstories



Series: Enterprise-99 [2]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Bonding, Breakup, F/M, M/M, Uhura's mentioned but not present
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2017-11-27
Packaged: 2019-02-07 12:24:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12841125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adroitstories/pseuds/adroitstories
Summary: Kirk is having relationship troubles with Bones. Spock notices and tries to help.





	Melting Your Tear Ducts Sounds Extreme

**Author's Note:**

> This was really fun to write! I hope you like it!

Spock looked up from his lab equipment to see Captain Kirk and Doctor McCoy laughing as they came back into the lab. McCoy uncharacteristically smiled as he looked at Spock.

 

“Commander! Just finished lunch with the captain. It was a lot of fun.”

 

Spock nodded. “I have found that if you do not have sustenance, your efficiency and your lab results decrease by thirteen-point-six-two percent. Therefore, it makes sense that you should not only eat, but share a meal with a friend. Both increase your productivity.”

 

The captain and Doctor McCoy looked at each other and rolled their eyes. “Yeah, well, I’m glad my productivity has increased.” He turned to the captain and smiled. “I’ll see you later, darling.” He walked into the next room, and both Kirk and Spock heard commotion as McCoy berated some of the other doctors about the cleanliness of the lab.

 

“I should get going,” the captain said, and turned to walk away.

 

“Captain? A word, if you please.” Spock gestured to a lab stool. The other man nodded and sat down. “What’s going on between you and Doctor McCoy?”

 

Captain Kirk’s eyes widened a fraction. “What are you talking about?”

 

“Your shoulders tightened when he called you ‘darling.’ Your nostrils flared when I asked you what was wrong, and the stain on your cuff and the smell of your breath indicates that you have eaten okra, a food which you have expressed disdain for on multiple occasions. Now, why would you eat a type of food you absolutely despise?”

 

“Kindness,” the captain shrugged his shoulders.

 

Spock shook his head. “Pity,” he said. “You are about to break up with him.”

 

“Damn,” Kirk swore under his breath. “You are good.”

 

Spock shrugged.

 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” the captain said, folding his arms.

 

“I regret the words we have already spoken,” Spock agreed. “I know it is probably unwise for me to get involved, but in addition to yourself, I consider Doctor McCoy to be a good man, and essential to the functionality of the ship. I hope you will, to use a Human saying, ‘let him down easy.’”

 

“Don’t worry,” the captain nodded. He paused. “I’m going to send him a text on his communicator, while he’s sleeping, that reads, ‘We’re done.’”

 

“Clear, accurate.” Spock paused. “But—do you feel like that would be enough?”

 

The captain paused. “'We’re done…goodbye.'”

 

Spock nodded his approval. “Yes. That should do it.”

 

oOo

 

“You asked for me, Mr. Spock?” the captain asked.

 

“Yes. I told Uhura last night about how I approved of your plan to break up with the doctor, and she said that we were quote, ‘emotionally-stunted men’ unquote.”

 

“So, you’re going to dump her, right?” Kirk asked, eyebrows raised, and a half-smile on his face.

 

Spock shook his head. “No. I think she may have a point. You might need to do more than simply…text.”

 

Kirk leaned forward in his chair. “A long, drawn out break-up is just going to result in a big scene and Bones crying. He has so many emotions, and I just don’t know how to deal with that.”

 

“I know.” Spock nodded. “It is daunting. But I did some research on amicable breakups. Using the ship’s computer, I visited www-dot-ladies-good-health-mag-dot-com-backslash-sex-hyphen-relationships-backslash-eight-six-seven-five-nine-nine-zero-four-backslash-four-three-two-ampersand-zero-dot.html.”

 

He paused. “Do you know the site?”

 

“No,” Kirk said.

 

“Well,” Spock began, “—apparently it is easier if you acknowledge the dumpee’s feelings.”

 

Kirk’s eyes widened.

 

“But do not be alarmed. We will practice. I will pretend to be the doctor.” Spock cleared his throat. “Let us begin.”

 

“Never thought I’d be taking relationship advice from a Vulcan,” Kirk muttered.

 

“Captain, if you please. I am trying to assist you.”

 

“Okay.” Kirk coughed. “Bones. I wanna break up.”

 

Spock attempted to mimic Bones’ southern twang. “That makes me feel sad. I am sad.”

 

“Your sadness is noted and appreciated. I’m very sorry.”

 

“I feel acknowledged. Thank you for breaking up with me.” Spock nodded. “It will take me eight minutes to collect my things.”

 

Kirk nodded. “I think that went well.”

 

oOo

 

Spock next saw Kirk as he rounded the corner. The captain caught his eye and walked quickly towards him.

 

“How did the breakup go?” Spock asked.

 

“I tried to acknowledge his feelings. It wasn’t easy,” Kirk nodded his head for emphasis, “—there were _a lot_ of them.” Kirk recounted that he had tried to inconspicuously leave while Doctor McCoy had started talking about his feelings.

 

“So, I came back inside, and we talked about feelings for twenty minutes.”

 

Spock raised both of his eyebrows. Kirk saw and sighed.

 

“I know. But I think it went well. And at least there was no crying.”

 

Spock nodded. “Well done, Captain.”

 

“I’m actually—” here the captain paused and looked around. He lowered his voice and said, “I’m actually really glad you made me do it this way. I got to tell him that even though it was ending…” here Kirk’s voice started shaking, “…it was incredibly meaningful to me, and even though we work together and everything…”

 

Spock thought he saw tears in the captain’s eyes.

 

“…I’m really going to miss him.”

 

Spock opened his mouth to speak, but Kirk held up a hand to stop him. He huffed out a small, sad laugh and ducked his head against the wall. After a pause of exactly half a second, Kirk popped back up, smiling, all traces of tears gone. He waved goodbye to Spock and walked away.

 

oOo

 

Captain Kirk walked into Spock’s quarters.

 

“Thank you for coming, Captain.” He gestured for the captain to take a seat, which he did.

 

“I want to apologize for yesterday. Inserting myself into my captain and my chief medical officer’s breakup somehow…backfired.”

 

Kirk waved a hand. “It’s not your fault. I was the one who made a scene, like a crybaby.” He turned to Spock. The Vulcan could almost feel the unshed tears in his voice. “Honestly, I’m thinking of having my tear ducts melted shut. I’m thinking it would make me a more efficient captain. Your thoughts?” And while there may have been a smile on his captain’s face, Spock knew that Jim was heartbroken.

 

Spock chose his words carefully. “I do not think that would be beneficial to your Human biology, Captain.” He paused. Jim scoffed. In a lower voice, Spock continued, “In addition, based on my observations, your feelings are one of the traits that make you a most exemplary captain. Your care and empathy for the crew, your bravery, your self-assurance, which in turn reassures the crew—these traits are part of what make you, in my opinion, one of the best examples of humanity.”

 

Spock paused. And then, to cut the heaviness that suddenly seemed to suffocate the room, he added, “And while this may sound incredible, coming from me, but…it is not the end of the world to…feel…things.”

 

Jim laughed. “I guess not,” he agreed. “It’s gotta be up there, though.”

 

“Sometimes.”

 

“Sometimes,” Jim agreed. “The thing is, for me it’s easy to show those emotions, like you said. But any introspection, having to deal with my own feelings, it’s harder. I care about the crew—that’s why it’s easy to be brave, to seem self-assured. But the second it becomes about me…” he trailed off. “And the thing is, I really do care about Bones. But he wanted to get married, and I’m just…not ready for that. And that’s a big thing, for him. He got out of a really nasty divorce, right as we were heading into the Academy.  And if I’m not ready with a guy like Bones, then will I ever be ready?”

 

His voice started trembling, just the slightest bit. Someone else might not have been able to hear it. But Spock could hear it.

 

“What if that was my one chance at love, and I just blew it? I don’t know,” Jim sighed. “I’m probably being ridiculous.”

 

Spock shook his head. “I do not think you are ‘being ridiculous.’” He sighed. “Before I met Nyota, I was utterly alone. Being a child of two worlds, while it has its advantages, also means I never belonged anywhere. On Vulcan, I never quite managed to fit in. At the Academy, while I was not shunned, I hardly managed to make friends, either. Nyota, while she was a student of mine, she became my first friend. And eventually, that relationship turned into its current incarnation.” Spock exhaled. “It is very easy to think that you will always remain in a state of isolation. But I do not think that is the case. And besides—you are, and always will be my friend, Jim.” Spock, affectionately, clasped Jim’s shoulder.

 

“And if you wish to cry in my presence, Captain, know that I will never tell the crew, and I will not judge you as lesser for it.”

 

Jim almost seemed to crumple, all pretenses gone, and started sobbing quietly. Spock, a little hesitant, moved closer to him, and recalling his memories from the Academy, watching how the cadets comforted each other after a particularly horrific test grade, allowed Jim to lean on him, and commenced to lightly rubbing circles on his back.

 

They stayed like that for half an hour.

**Author's Note:**

> NOTES: So I guess in this story Kirk and Bones got together, and Spock and Uhura are together. So there might not be a whole lot of continuity in this Enterprise-99 universe. Oh well.
> 
> I really do love Uhura, and I love her and Spock's relationship in AOS. I think they're great together. And I guess, no matter in which universe, Kirk and Spock are the best of friends. There's honestly no way I can write them where they don't deeply care about each other.
> 
> Pls leave kudos/comments if you want me to write more! I appreciate it. Thanks for reading.


End file.
